AVP2: Requiem

It begins with an Alien baby incubating inside a nameless Predator. There is some kind of gene exchange (known in our species as "boning"). Out comes the Alien-Predator, or Predalien, hybrid.

We must resist reading too much into the semantic redundancy of this love-child between an Alien that is also a predator and a Predator that is also an alien, lest our brains work themselves into an infinite logical loop and a seizure.

Is this normal behavior for Aliens? I do vaguely remember a Sigourney-Alien hybrid in one of the later Alien movies, but was that the same deal? Wasn't Sigourney herself a hybrid in that, or something? No, she was artificially inseminated by an Alien? Your best Alien-loving friend or even a cursory glance at Wiki can answer this question, but ... do we care?

This movie certainly does not; it barely acknowledges any prior movie in either venerable franchise except the first AVP movie, which in comparison seemed much more respectful to its ancestors.

Alien and Predator movies are supposed to be about a single man or woman's experience with the respective creature. Sigourney started with a supporting cast, but ultimately it was her experience against the beast that remained. Arnold went it alone (with only hormonal assistance) against the dreadlocked Predator.

In this movie, an entire cast of hapless townspeople get skinned, dissolved, pierced, beheaded, shredded and sliced. An entire helicopter full of people also survive until the end. This ain't the airlift of Saigon (which, incidentally, was unfortunately named "Operation Frequent Wind"), people. We are looking for the chosen one. Instead we are given a waste of time and a flaccid ending that only huge Alien fans will find insightful. I bemoan this lost cinematic opportunity, and you should, too.